Aku tidaklah sebegitu

Assalamualaikum..

Bismillah..

Aku tidaklah cukup warak atau alim,

tidaklah bertahajjud tiap malam,

tidak juga menjaga solat di awal waktu,

tidak juga menjaga yang sunat,

tidak menjaga hubungan sesama manusia,
tidak mampu bercakap penuh hikmah,

tidak cukup sempurna menjaga hubungan dengan Allah, 

tidak semaksima berguna kepada ummah,

tidak menuntut ilmu sepenuhnya,

tidak menjadi anak yang soleh,

tidak menjadi teman yang berguna,

tidak menjadi murid yang tumpu,

tidak itu dan ini..

Tapi aku yakin, 

aku tidaklah sebegitu selamanya.

Belum.

Atau dengan kata lainnya masih memperbaiki diri. 

Aku tidak sebegitu, kerna aku masih memperbaiki.

Aku masih memperbaiki diri. Fahami aku.
Aku masih belajar,

Membimbing diri ku untuk menjadi 'begitu'

Yang ku tahu, 'itu' semua persediaan. 

Persediaan dan persiapan.

Kerna kematian,

bukan mainan,

Aku tidaklah sebegitu,
Tapi aku rindu untuk menemuiNya, Sang Pencipta,

Aku tidaklah sebegitu,

tapi aku cemburu,

Pada pemuda,

 menemuiNya di awal usia,

Peribadinya elok, ilmunya tinggi,

Mereka pergi meninggalkan dunia,

penuh fana, yang hanya sementara, tiada apa.

Sejenak aku berfikir,

Andai aku dijemputNya seawal itu,

di usia INI

Cukupkah bekalan ku?

Atau,
Adakah hidupku masih panjang?


Cuma ini pinta ku,

Aku sedang berusaha,

Untuk jadi yang terbaik,

Andai ada khilaf,
Maafkanlah,
Tegur-tegurlah.

Hidup penuh onar. Biasalah ;)

Aku yakin,
Ya Rahmaan, Ya Rahiim,
Maha Pemurah,  Maha Penyayang.

Kau mengujiku,
Kau sayang padaku.

Juga pada hamba2 Mu.

;)

something to say, something to see.

Assalmualaikum, Bismillah ;)

When I first came to cfs. There's no excitement in me. Even I packed AAALL my things on the night before the registration day. So, imagine the hard feelings, all in one. I don't know what I was thinking., since I really wanted to study in INTEC. hehe. By the way, The facilities seem cannot be used. The shower without the 'kepala'. ah, banyak lagi lah. malas nak cerita. But never mind, it was all passed now.

After a few months, I started to accept that I am studying in the uia ~ tak payah nak banyak songeh sangat. something like that. There's more poor people outside there living worst than I am. I should be grateful.

Now, I totally living my life in CFS, IIUM PJ ;)

Actually, there's many things to do in the campus instead at home. hehe.
Even in the cfs, solat ku terjaga. Tiap waktu dengar azan.
At home, we can't hear azan at all ! seriously. So, we just guessing whether dah masuk waktu or not. Means, kalau dah 4;30 sah2 la dah Asar. or just tengok apps waktu solat.
At my hostel, I heard azan subuh and terkejut like nyawa macam dah nak dicabut dah. haa.. tak bangun jugak tak tahu la kann ;'D
In the campus, I join the Taekwondo Club, ^,^
Our training session is on Monday and Wednesday night.
At least, there is something to do.
Then, me and my friend jog on Monday and Wednesday in the morning for 20 minutes, around the campus or twice around the field. We just started ;) Badan Cergas ! Otak Cerdas ! ;'D isn't it ?


Jyeahh ~! ;)

Can't wait to do my BEST ^,^

Jazakallahu Khairan Katheera ;)

Semester 2

Assalamualaikum.
Bismillah..

Semester 2 just started.
I was so excited to start this semester.
I have set my new azam and goals for this sem, to discipline myself, come early to class.. focus more in the class, do not sleep. and many more :* muah!

In the previous semester, I was kinda shocked. konon. Tak ready with the learning styles and stuff. because of that, I don't really pay attention in class, get bored easily, didn't jot down any notes! silly me. The result, my cgpa went really bad. I need to repeat a paper. So I decided to extend my study in cfs for two months next year. I want to add and drops few subjects to make it easy to score. Pray for me. ;)

Second is to improve my ibaadah. the wajib and sunat. In the campus.. I feel easy to jaga my solat fardhu, to make sure myself solat di awal waktu ;) Alhamdulillah. But at home, I need to practise more. Cuz there's tv, fast internet connection, iPad, laptops, air conditioner, comfy beds comforter. haha >.<

Basically, one of my targets now is to get DEAN's LIST. no matter what.
Turkiye Burslari (turkiye govn shcolarship) is my GOALS for now ;')
The applications are twice a year.

Pray for me.
Jazakallahu khairan katheera for reading ;)

Semester 1

Assalamualaikum, Bismillah..

Hey .. this time agak panjang..

So yea~
the first semester going to end soon,.
We all had our last group photossss for our laaast class for each subject..

quite sad to end this semester, the lecturers, my dearest classmates, and the bond we have..
But I believe, the bond and friendship of us will never end,

Honestly, they are the best classmates I have ever had in my entire life living for 18 yrs :P melebih pulak aku..
I just cant describe it one by one. Semua perangai gila katak and sekepala..
what I could say is, It is not same as school ..

here, we have night classes, projects - the serious one, we manage a talk, donation and many more.. we nangis, gelak and stress sama2 .. luls~ we rarely do this back in school isn't.. or maybe I'm the only one ? haha I dont know :)
But I really appreciate it

Even sometimes I feel down,.. My friends are there.. especially these 2 girls who always motivate me. that 2 girls who always know what I feel, haha selalu lunch sama2.. >.< if u guys are here reading this, ya kno wha' ? I love yahh~
Ahhah~ that moment when I feel deadly down - it was the performance of Informative Speech, she said this.. ''hey, relax la,.. I ain't even give a f ' for the speech'' something liddat~

why u care much about the marks ? atleast u know u have did ya best.. nothing is matter. yea, aku mula terima hakikat.
after the class habis, we lepak2 kejap kat luar, kat parking lot..memang mencemarkan pandangan orang lalu lalang.. lama jugak laa..
talking nonsense and still berbincang why we always feel x tenang n susah je doing something..ha.. mesti ada sebab.,and about things to do and not, such as,.. u kena jaga solat, jangan solat lewat2, nanti Allah payahkan urusan kite.. haa ada baiknya jugak dalam kegilaan nya

memang betul pun .
 urusan kita jadi susah bila kita tak menjaga urusan kita dengan Allah. Hati tu rasa semacam.

Ok back to le topic..

I have 2 papers to go for my final exam, it is on 9th n 10th Oct.. do pray for me ^.^v

And! I've been thinking about what to do for the upcoming semester break ..
one of them,, which I have started it already :D --> To Watch Harry Potter Movies back-to-back from the first season. reput laaa aku.. hahaha for now, season 1 done..
akan bersambung.. can't wait !

Ok that's all
Goodluck for me !

Thank you ! :*

Apakah hari ini ?? Takdir ? Allah mahu mengajar aku sesuatu

Assalamualaikum, Bismillah..

nak menyumpah boleh harini ? :P

Sumpah laa ada beza kalau kita solat / menjaga waktu.. ada bezanya awal dan lambat kita solat.. especially solat subuh..
kau jaga solat2 kau.. mudah urusan2 kau.. percaya do! rasa masa banyaaak je.. macam lebih 24 jam sehari :) kau rasa tenang, kau tak rasa guilty selalu.. kalau kita solat subuh lambat especially, rasa berdosa satu harii.. ergghh

lagi satu sumpah,

Sumpah laa kehidupan belajar sangat tough dan memerlukan kita meletakkan pengharapan yang super tinggi kat Allah swt .. The Only One.. Nangessss :'(


wehh and another thing..

Seriously !! Result is almost nothing, The thing is our effort ..
Hah ? Dah buat yang terbaik ? wallahualam..
*aku rasa aku belum buat yang terbaikk <-- because I dont really like the subjects for this sem* So Im pretty damn sure I have not do my best yet for this sem.. omg. -_-


next sem and sem2 seterusnya,.. I wanna try and do my very best..hihi
dah taknak dah miss2 kelas or lambat2 gi kelas... Im sick of it.. Seriously I hate it..


Aku pelajar..
kalau la aku mati dalam kesungguhan menuntut ilmu, mungkin aku syahid..Allahu..

Aku nak belajar.. nak belajar elok2, lillahitaala..

aim jangka pendek aku sekarang nk belajar elok2 untuk layakkan aku dapat biasiswa for degree nanti.. or nk belajar kat turkiy.. hihi.. ntah hape2 je an angan2 aku?

tapi xpe, biar lah .. tak cepat pun, Allah akan bagi jugak someday..

WOW!!

Assalamualaikum..
Bismillah..

Serious  tak tahu nak tulis apa.. but.. yea I really wanna say something..

Just want to say..Aku punya tanggungjawab! yeahh.. tanggungjawab menjadi contoh yang baik..especially for my younger siblings! Menjadi orang yang baik , orang yang berguna !

lepas tu jadi contoh yang baik pada masyarakat..
lepas tu belajar tinggi tinggi..
lepastu jadi pakar dalam sesuatu bidang..
LEPASTU !! jadi rujukan kepakaran dalam sesuatu bidang! yeah ;'D

Rugila kita kalau hidup hanya untuk bernafas dan cari makan..kan..
monyet juga keluar bekerja mencari makanan.. wakaka.. Just if you know what I mean. >.<
ntah lahh.. faham2 kan lah sendiri

 Contribute something! INSYAALLAH~

Nak jadi Philosopher kan ?!

I will do my very best, no matter what ^.^

Bukan 4 Flat yang dikejar,
tapi tak bermaksud untuk ku tersasar..
*found this quote somewhere*

Jyeah.. pray for me ;)

Early Marriage

Assalamualaikum,
Bismillah,


So, my mom always (sometimes) discuss with us about early marriage,. just now, when we are all in our car on the way to cfs, we have talk about marriage. It was kinda shock me cuz she really dont mind if I want to marry young. She's really dont mind. Its a sunnah.. it can prevent zina and fitnah. ''If someone wants you, why not just nikah~'' haha, my mom said this..

A few days ago, my senior got married, both 20 yrs old.. damn young for me.. ^_^ batchmate pulak tu. so sweet .. Alhamdulillah. when I watched their pictures .wahhh. I feel like I wanna be like them .. So mature , they dont look young at all.

But kena ingat semua tu perlu Ilmu, bukan benda main2. seriously.
Our amalan, ibadah, solat semua tu kena elok dulu.. I just wanna cry !
even subuh pun kadang x terjaga..
Aku perlu baiki ini semua.. jaga solat ku, tahajjud ku, tilawah ku :'(

Study hard and smart ! take care of yourself, mind your manner, be a good muslimah and daughter and many more. I just wanna be like them.

am suddenly remembered this , my mom said - 'bring him la kakak .. I would like to meet him.'
'he's actually my friend , idk..maybe a close friend ? but~ yea I try to 'jaga ikhtilat' among us ^_^
I dont have any relationship with him,
I dont want to involve to any relationship like couple or whatever,
I just want to keep my love only for my husband..
'Pemilik Cintaku Setelah Allah dan Rasul', Fatimah Syarha's book. ;) Bagus buku ni.

Im not 'menggatal' tau.. haha. Just for preparations...
Maybe 2 or 3 yrs from now ? haha who knows!


Ameeeeen :P

cfs IIUM

Assalamualaikum ,
Bismillah.

So Im now studying in Centre for Foundation Studies, International Islamic University Malaysia~
chehhh..
Selama satu tahun, kawan2 yang lain ada dapat satu setengah or dua tahun, berdasarkan placement test pada awal kemasukan kami kat sini.

1 year duration of study, it must be tough..  sekarang pun dah hampir sebulan aku di sini dah rasa stress dengan project dan presentation.
plus, kat sini lecture 100% in english, discussion semua in english..
classmates semua berhabuk speaking, dan aku di situ diam je macam tikus.. jadilah aku budak yang sedikit pendiam berbanding kat sekolah dulu-banyak cakap n tanya soalan..
menulis n membaca mungkin lebih mudah berbanding speaking -lack of practice and confidence..

Ku cerita masalah ni dekat umi sambil bergenang air mata.. diorang terer sangat, rasa down sangat..sampaikan kakak nak tanya2 soalan n discuss pun susah :'(
umi cakap takpe.. lama2 mesti ok punyya..practice je dengan kawan2.. (n byk lagi pujukan lain yang memujuk diri) :)

hehe kemahiran bercakap ku sedikit kurang.. yang lain semua okay,insyaAllah - tulis essay, sebab dah selalu practice masa spm dulu >.<

Tapi aku tekad, lepas ni aku mesti fasih speaking ! mestii.. perlu tingkatkan lagi keyakinan~
aku sedang menuntut ilmu sekarang, aku di alam universiti,bukan lagi sekolah..
perlu independent.. fiuuhh..
aku anggap ini jihad besar..
Aku perlu sentiasa ingatkan diri dengan impian dan cita2 aku, untuk menuntut ilmu setingginya, menjelajah banyak negara untuk mengambil pengajaran dan iktibar dari nya, menuntut ilmu di negara orang :D
jadi contoh pada adik2, jadi seorang yang pakar dalam satu2 bidang, dan jadi orang yang berguna untuk masyarakat.. jadi anak yang baik, hamba yang diredhai..



I will do my best here,in cfs
and will not forget my dreams since primary school~ to study oversea...to speak english fluently. soon, my dreams will come true.. InsyaAllah !

Allah is always with us, helping us, guiding us..
be hopefull and always do our best :')

#8RAMADHAN ^^v  :* <3

'Keluar'

Assalamualaikum
Bismillah

tika aku menulis ni, hati sedih ..air mata meleleh tanpa sedar.

Aku juga berdosa.. manusia sangat pendosa..
Siapalah aku untuk menegur..
Adakah kesempurnaan perlu untuk mengajak kebaikan?
Kalau begitu , tiadalah siapa di dunia untuk mengajak kebaikan.

Tidakkah kita sedar hidup ini sementara saja ?
tidakkah nanti kita merasa rugi,
padahal hidup didunia ini puratanya 60 tahun saja ? tetapi 'disana' beribu2 tahun.. yang umpama seharinya bagai seribu tahun ?
Kehidupan abadi itu disana.. mahukah kita menyesal di akhirat nnti .. 'sepatutnya aku bersabar seketika, rupanya aku didunia tidak lama.'

Kita ini ciptaan terbaik , mempunyai akal dan fikiran. KITA INI KHALIFAH .

'Keluar' lah mencari Allah sang Pencipta
sampai kan kebaikan islam walau sepatah, kerana itu anjuran Rasulullah saw.

saya juga ingatkan diri, bahawa dunia ini sudah akhir zaman..

Jom, mari sama2 memberi sesuatu kepada agama., dan menjadi ummat islam yang baik !

InsyaAllah..Wallahualam..
Assalamualaikum ^,^

Comeback, Hello ! Im a teacher.

Bismillahirrahmaanirrahim ..

there's quite a long time that I have not post anything.. before spm, until now.(dah nak masuk U).haha

I've worked at 3 different places.while waiting for my spm and upu result. all need interaction with kids.. ;)
1. Al Amin Transit.gombak.. I quit after a half month ..
2. Al Amin Transit.Kl.. also same. cuz I continue my study. I took English proficiency class.
3. Now.. as a temporary standard one english teacher ... wakakaka

Its fun. but also tiring and stressfull ..
Imagine ,, handling standard one student .. macam2 karenah and kepala..
huh .. even to keep them quiet and sit on their place take a long time..kau boleh pecah anak tekak toqq..

budak2.. there must be one or two students that really uncontrollable (blh sakit jiwa) ..
so how.., praise them nicely -.-
I also dunno.. but most of the time when I enter the class, they will shout 'yeayy teacher englishhh!!' :3
no matter how loud you shout to keep them quiet , they still make the class like a playground. if there any rezeki, tggu lah cikgu lain masuk kelas kite, then marah.. suruh dorg diam. chehh, elok plak dorg senyap...

and pernah one day.. a teacher came, what I see all around, students really afraid of her, and keep quiet during her class (perggh).. at that time, my class really huru hara.. I cannot handle, they were shouting and playing like Im not there. tiba2 the teacher masuk and shout asked them to keep quiet , the class suddenly 'krikk krikk' .. and few students 've been called by her.

minutes later , the students came back and went near me and say 'teacher, kami mintak maaf sebab jerit2 dan tak hormat teacher, kami janji tak buat lagi' .. haha cute. heh, lepas tu buat balik. ahh bia la mereka tak tahu apa ^_^ , kecik lagi


huh, many things I've learned.. being a teacher also can make me prepare, for the tiring and stressfull situation that I will face in the future.

do pray for me ^_^ :*
Im going to be a university student soon ! muahh..